


Reassurances

by twigglettz



Category: Destiny (Video Game)
Genre: Cayde not having to pretend he's fine all the time, Cuddles, Domestic, Fluff, M/M, Post Red Legion invasion, SO MUCH FLUFF, Where is Zavala's Ghost, Won't someone think of the datapads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-07 10:39:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12231183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twigglettz/pseuds/twigglettz
Summary: He wanted to get up, wanted to run his hands across the vast expanse of blue skin, try and smooth out the creases on his brow and in his soul, but really, Cayde was just as broken and he worried the effort would shatter them both.





	Reassurances

"What is this?" Cayde's voice was quiet, hesitant, and he winced at how pathetic he sounded. Zavala didn't seem to notice, didn't even turn to acknowledge him, and Cayde's fingers twitched nervously against the datapad in his lap. He was sat cross-legged on Zavala's small cot, back resting against the wall behind him. It was little more than a bench with old sheets draped over it, pushed haphazardly against the corner of the small room Zavala had claimed as his own, but it was better than the floor. The room itself was almost bare; most things had perished in the Red Legion attack, and the bits and pieces they'd managed to pry from the wreckage had far more useful places to go. Zavala had had to use his Vanguard privileges to get himself a desk and a small stool. They were slightly charred on the left side and there were a few bullets lodged in a stool leg, but they were both sturdy enough to use, so the larger man hadn't complained.

"I mean... this. Us." Cayde gestured between the two of them, albeit mostly out of habit, as Zavala was still hunched over the table reading his reports. At any other time Cayde would have made a scene to get Zavala's attention, would have provoked him into turning round, teased and joked and goaded him until the Titan had to kiss him just to shut him up. But even across the room, Cayde could see Zavala's shoulders shaking, saw him gripping a datapad so tightly that his knuckles were white, and he knew that the news must be bad. All news was bad nowadays, but Zavala had always stood steadfast in the face of adversity. Cayde figured it must be a list of deceased Titans, had to be, because that was the only thing that could affect the Commander that much. And maybe Cayde as well, if he tried hard enough. But he didn't, couldn't bring himself to, so he turned back to his own datapad and ignored the flashing notification of new reports.

"Does it matter?" Cayde looked up, surprised at the response, and whatever he had left in his chest ached at the sorrow in Zavala's voice. He buried his face in his hands, elbows only barely keeping him upright, and he looked like a completely different man from the unwavering Vanguard that the rest of the world saw. He was by no means a small man, not even close, and Cayde always joked that his biceps were bigger than the Exo's entire body. He'd stripped out of his armour hours ago and replaced his undersuit with a pair of loose black trousers, and his defeated posture made him look positively tiny in comparison. It had taken nearly half an hour, as Zavala's Ghost was still missing, and Cayde had sat silently admiring the view. He wanted to get up, wanted to run his hands across the vast expanse of blue skin, try and smooth out the creases on his brow and in his soul, but really, Cayde was just as broken and he worried the effort would shatter them both.

"I just want to know where we stand." That finally made Zavala turn round, an annoyed sigh falling from his lips, and he scowled at him like he always did when Cayde was playing up. He opened his mouth to berate him, but stopped short when he realised Cayde was being serious, and his face softened into a look of affection. He wasn't sure what to say, didn't know what Cayde wanted to hear, but he hadn't slept in almost three days and he was far too tired to pick his words carefully. He opted for the truth instead.

"Toe to toe. Like always." It was Cayde's turn to scowl, and he half-heartedly dropped his datapad onto the cot before throwing his arms up in mock exasperation.

"You know what I mean! Stop being a dick." It was a shadow of his usual overreaction, but it was familiar enough to force a low chuckle from the Titan in front of him. Cayde grinned in response, glad he could take Zavala's mind off the shit storm they were expected to magically fix, even if it was only for a second. Zavala looked at him with such warmth that Cayde could almost feel it in his circuitry. It was the same look he gave to his Titans after they reported in, when Zavala had dismissed them and they were leaving the Hall of Guardians. Cayde had seen it every day, even if the Titans hadn't, and Ikora had always rolled her eyes at Cayde's small smile in response.

The stool scraped across the concrete floor as Zavala stood, kicking it under the desk with his bare foot before turning to switch the datapad off. It clattered back onto the wood with a loud crack, but Zavala didn't seem concerned if he'd smashed it, and padded over to the bed without a second thought. Cayde shuffled up a little to give him room as he sat, snatching his datapad from the sheets at the last minute before Zavala settled down next to him. They didn't have many of them left, and Ikora would kill them if they'd broken two. They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes as Cayde gave him time to come up with an answer. He idly traced the lines of the tattoo on Zavala's forearm where it rested on his knee and Zavala hummed in response. He turned his arm over to grasp Cayde's hand and brought it up to his lips, placing a soft kiss on his palm.

"We're just us. We don't need to quantify it." The words were soft, but heartfelt, and Cayde wasn't sure how to reply. It wasn't what he'd expected. He thought Zavala would snap back into his regular stoic self, berate him for worrying about semantics when the Light was gone, when thousands of their people were dead or dying, when their homes were being destroyed by the minute. But he didn't. Instead, he gestured to the bed, shifting to pull the sheets up as much as he could with Cayde still sitting there. He shuffled off the cot, watching as Zavala settled in, and pulled off the last few pieces of his leather armour. He looked around briefly for somewhere to put them, before throwing them towards the pile of Titan armour Zavala had stacked in the opposite corner. He peeled the covers back, trying to ignore the fact that they still smelled faintly of smoke, and laid down with his back against Zavala's chest.

There was so much uncertainty in the world at the moment, so many questions that Cayde didn't have the answers to, and the strain of keeping his Hunters alive when he was effectively blind kept him up at night. But Zavala's arm made a pretty good pillow, the huge expanse of his chest was warm against his back, his fingers stroking small, soothing circles on his hip, and Cayde realised Zavala was right. It wasn't a relationship he could really put into words, and he found he didn't really want to either. It was family. Trust. Love. There were so many ways to explain, but none of them did it any justice. Whatever it was, it was perfect, Cayde thought. Well, almost. He intertwined his fingers with Zavala's and put on the lowest voice his modulator could muster, turning to face the Titan, trying, and failing, to suppress a grin.

"So, now we've sorted that out... how about a quickie?" The light smack on his head was worth it for the rumble of laughter in Zavala's chest, and he responded by pressing his lips against Cayde's mouth plate. Yeah, Cayde decided, as he deepened the kiss. Now it was perfect.


End file.
